Proud Americant Anthem

The Proud Americant Anthem (which surprisingly can be sung to "God Bless The USA"): 

If tomorrow all the things were gone,
I’d worked so hard to get.
And I had to start again,
with just half my credit card debt.
I’d thank my lucky stars,
if FEMA showed up today.

‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom,
well as long as you’re not gay.

And I’m proud to be an Americant,
where at most I am not free.
And I can’t forget to pay the bills,
To make others more money,
And I gladly sit down,
next to you, ‘cause I just won’t vote today.
Yes, there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.

From citizens with no healthcare,
to the rising cost of gas.
Across over flowing jail cells,
From Osama’s who laugh.
From illegal immigration,
and kids who sleep hungry.
Well there’s fear in every American heart,
and it’s time we stand and plead.

That I’m proud to be an Americant,
I’ma joke to other countries.
And our children aren’t as smart as theirs,
Who cares, I’ll just watch TV,
And I gladly sit down,
and not catch up, on the news of today.
Yes, there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.